Chissy in normal life

Alf

Well-known member
What do you think life is like in the Chisnall household?

‘I *believe* a brew is being made, under the - err - *ever watchful eye* of my wife (is it my wife or is it Scott Vernon?? Oh it’s Paul Ince) - here she comes now then at pace - tries to find the coaster and *does* - I notice the bag is still in the cup, she’s give me *work to do*’
 

Rektseasider

Well-known member
What do you think life is like in the Chisnall household?

‘I *believe* a brew is being made, under the - err - *ever watchful eye* of my wife (is it my wife or is it Scott Vernon?? Oh it’s Paul Ince) - here she comes now then at pace - tries to find the coaster and *does* - I notice the bag is still in the cup, she’s give me *work to do*’
Very very funny. 😂👏
 

Macseasider

Well-known member
To be read in Chisnall's voice.

"Oh HERE WE GO Mrs Chisnall, YOU'VE MADE your point. You've MADE your point. Yes I WANTED A BREW but you've made YOUR point. One word. IDIOTIC. JUST IDIOTIC. Don't make this house a disgrace by leaving this kitchen. She MADE her point and she just walked out. ABSOLUTELY STUPID. IDIOT. WHATEVER SHE thinks about making me a brew, walking out of the kitchen is NOTHING more than a TOTAL disgrace. That is all I have to say about it. A total disgrace. GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN. THIS house will NOT benefit from IDIOTs walking out of this kitchen."
 

Rektseasider

Well-known member
Another highlight tonight was when he said Chris Maxwell bounces the ball, he’s not got to the Rafael Nadal standard of bouncing yet...

It went on mute after that.

The guy is a mentalist.
Funny hearing these because I can’t deal with him so I’m an away commentary man now.

But these are just gold after the game.
 

Macseasider

Well-known member
My rant about tonight on another thread about Chisnal and Brett.

By all means have a coffee in the 15 min break, have a sandwich, a kebab, whatever you fancy.

And whilst you aren't talking during the game be a pro and have a sip of water. I get that. It's a lot of talking.

On Saturday Brett was actually sucking on a sweet whilst talking in the first half. It was revolting to listen to. I think he has a cold - think he still has tonight as he was slobbering into the microphone throughout.

But sitting there in the second half laughing off your coffee spill is really unprofessional. It's as if he and Chiz are just on a freebee. Fcuking do the job professionally. They are being paid to do so. Describe the game accurately for radio listeners. Tonight was an utter joke. Chisnall seems to have zero standards. No wonder he never progressed to "proper" commentary.

The sound of sucking sweets whilst talking, sipping coffee, dropping coffee, having general chit chat rather than tell the listener where the ball is and what is happening is really not on. As BBC paid staff it should be better. A lot better.
 

Tangerine_Dream

Well-known member
What do you think life is like in the Chisnall household?

‘I *believe* a brew is being made, under the - err - *ever watchful eye* of my wife (is it my wife or is it Scott Vernon?? Oh it’s Paul Ince) - here she comes now then at pace - tries to find the coaster and *does* - I notice the bag is still in the cup, she’s give me *work to do*’
Genius 😂 👏
 

Murphy9

Well-known member
The love in for Garner was shocking.... So Gretarsson has played international football but "he wont have ever played anyone like Garner..." WTF

Constantly getting names mixed up.

Apparently "Obi is huge"..... How many times did we have to hear that. Yeah, he's 6Ft 4, but to constantly go on about it.... annoying

He's so quick to be negative towards Blackpool. Wigan had the headed chance from Garner first half, which was an extremely comfortable save after a floated cross from out wide..... "That's lacklustre..... woeful defending......" Seriously. He's descriptive wording for what is supposed to be for the Radio is abysmal. Anyone just listening to his commentary would assume it is a totally different game to what's actually happening....
 

clappers

Well-known member
Ifollow video feed : a massively over hit cross to no-one that goes way beyond all Pool players landing outside the penalty area, whilst Yates stands there in front of goal looking totally bemused at the lack of service

Chiznutz radio : that’s a rocket of a ball into the mix and Yates could and should have moved wider in his positioning. He just doesn’t look right to me tonight Brett....
 

southshore

Well-known member
My two favourites from last night '....and thats Kai kai's second' (after he scored).

and (after the ball clearly went out for a corner) '..so where's the ball, can you see where the ball went Brett? I think its gone for a throw in'.

He also managed to confuse Dougal and Gabriel!
 

slakes_seasider

Well-known member
My two favourites from last night '....and thats Kai kai's second' (after he scored).

and (after the ball clearly went out for a corner) '..so where's the ball, can you see where the ball went Brett? I think its gone for a throw in'.

He also managed to confuse Dougal and Gabriel!
“Maxwell stays at home”
And when we are 1-0 down “Would you take half a loaf?”
 

Wizaard

Well-known member
The love in for Garner was shocking.... So Gretarsson has played international football but "he wont have ever played anyone like Garner..." WTF

Constantly getting names mixed up.

Apparently "Obi is huge"..... How many times did we have to hear that. Yeah, he's 6Ft 4, but to constantly go on about it.... annoying

He's so quick to be negative towards Blackpool. Wigan had the headed chance from Garner first half, which was an extremely comfortable save after a floated cross from out wide..... "That's lacklustre..... woeful defending......" Seriously. He's descriptive wording for what is supposed to be for the Radio is abysmal. Anyone just listening to his commentary would assume it is a totally different game to what's actually happening....
Obi is huge but lost out to Madine all night long.

PS I read this thread was in bad taste, so headed over immediately. Can't find anything other than light hearted joshing.
 

Costero Poderoso

Well-known member
ive put it elsewhere but the reference to blackpool never having any capability at set pieces - even during bretts time, was a very typical Chisnalism - Charlie Adam - maybe????

Chisnalism - a series of often disconnected words that are attempting to describe current events in an overly verbose manner and using innapropriate analogy whilst completely misrepresenting the events currently in motion.
 

Loco

Well-known member
I'm in stitches reading this. Maybe we should just enjoy the commentary for what it is. It often offers more talking points than the actual match. I couldn't help thinking of Charlie when he mentioned the terrible set pieces back in Brett's day. Presumably he'd had too much fizzy pop prematch at Wembley.
 

mull

Well-known member
I like him. As the team is doing ok then Mr Chis is the new go to whipping boy.
I just watch the match and marvel at his phraseology.. Plus hes inadvertantly very. funny. Lots of commentators really really irritate me Johnathan Pierce, Alan Green etc.
Plus he's giving us plenty to talk, rant and laugh about. Where would be the fun in getting a competant commentator in? How dull would that be?
 

Wizaard

Well-known member
I'm in stitches reading this. Maybe we should just enjoy the commentary for what it is. It often offers more talking points than the actual match. I couldn't help thinking of Charlie when he mentioned the terrible set pieces back in Brett's day. Presumably he'd had too much fizzy pop prematch at Wembley.
"Blackpool have never ever scored from a corner or a free kick in the time I've been watching them, even going back to your time, Brett"

Comedy gold. Meanwhile, Alex Ferguson said about Charlie Adam, that for his corners alone, he was worth £10 million. Still, what does he know about football?
 

Grayth

Well-known member
And don’t forget his fashion observations. He always resorts at some point to comments on kit colour
Yep. He just can't handle any sighting of the colour pink. Foams at the mouth. Which improves his commentary tbf.

And if you have a barnet that isn't short back and sides, you'll get the "in my day" treatment as well.
 

Wizaard

Well-known member
Yep. He just can't handle any sighting of the colour pink. Foams at the mouth. Which improves his commentary tbf.
During the Burton game he dropped Andy Lonergan right in it by mentioning his thoughts on pink kit. Homophobic at best.
 

Rektseasider

Well-known member
"Blackpool have never ever scored from a corner or a free kick in the time I've been watching them, even going back to your time, Brett"

Comedy gold. Meanwhile, Alex Ferguson said about Charlie Adam, that for his corners alone, he was worth £10 million. Still, what does he know about football?
😂 didn’t Charlie score direct from a corner in the Premier League year too. 😂
 

South Stand '58

Well-known member
The Wigan two were at least commentating on the game although at timnes they reminded me of Peter O'Sullivan calling the final few furlongs of the Grand National!
 

Rektseasider

Well-known member
Exactly, against West Ham? and Craig Cathcart scored from a corner against Man U for starters.
Yes that was it. I’d forgotten the game.

I’ve blocked that United game form my memory. 😂

Eardley against Everton was a sweet free kick too.

I’m glad I’ve read this thread I’ve laughed my head off might consider tuning in next time.
 

Dolphin Bar

Well-known member
Next commentary just count the amount of 'shot comes in' or 'that's high, wide and not very handsome' are spoken. Watching the game with his radio commentary just highlights how much of the game you are missing with just his audio with his error strewn observations. I know it's local radio but do we have to have him for every single game?
 

Wizaard

Well-known member
Next commentary just count the amount of 'shot comes in' or 'that's high, wide and not very handsome' are spoken. Watching the game with his radio commentary just highlights how much of the game you are missing with just his audio with his error strewn observations. I know it's local radio but do we have to have him for every single game?
Can't imagine he'll travel to Pompey or Charlton etc
 

Class_of_2010

Well-known member
Two things you can guarentee listening to the radio lancs commentary.

1. Brett breathing so loudly that I'm convinced he should be tested for COVID.

2. Chisnall 'Now Hamilton's fast but he's not that fast'
 

Stanah

Well-known member
Two things you can guarentee listening to the radio lancs commentary.

1. Brett breathing so loudly that I'm convinced he should be tested for COVID.

2. Chisnall 'Now Hamilton's fast but he's not that fast'
Love this thread and whilst I can see the funny side of his commentary and Brett's shear unprofessional approach I can't bare to let them ruin another match for me.
The football is often frustrating, the officials usually wind me up, the last thing I need is him pushing me over the edge!😠
 

Going Up the Pool

Well-known member
Love this thread and whilst I can see the funny side of his commentary and Brett's shear unprofessional approach I can't bare to let them ruin another match for me.
The football is often frustrating, the officials usually wind me up, the last thing I need is him pushing me over the edge!😠

Spot on. I'm all for giving people a chunk of slack, especially if they are charming, endearing or charismatic. This fella is non of these. He's just ... crap ... and it makes the whole thing less engaging and entertaining than it should be.

That's all.
 
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